20.12.10

A dream

Last night I had an amazing dream. The kind of dream that is amazing but still ok to expose to others (i.e. my two or three regular readers).

So. I was for some reason looking for a flat to move in by myself. So I went to this address in Brunstfield and knocked on the door. An old woman opened the door.
I got in the flat and here it was: a huge room with a huge bed, nice bed sheets, loads of pillows. The bed was in the centre of the living room. Maybe that means something? Lately I have been thinking about how great of a place bed is. The best place in the world. The best things happen in bed. Sleeping being the best of the bestest.
I was already impressed by this high ceiling, spacious, charming flat. It wasn't modern, the paint was crumbling down the white walls but god it just felt so homely. We then moved to the kitchen which was just as big as the first room. The cooking area just took 10% of the space or so. The rest was just empty space. And I remember thinking: "wow, imagine the great parties I could do here". It was ideal.
But the best part was still to come: a MASSIVE room just full of clothes racks and on every single hanger, magnificent cashmere jumpers. Jumpers of all sizes and colours. Jumpers with beads, pearls and sparkle. Amazing jumpers, all with this little airy layer on top of the wool -so typical of cashmere.

Ah it was beautiful. The space, the bed, the kitchen, the endless clothes racks full of jumpers.
And it was only £110 a week, I remember! Surely it was worth it!

When I left the flat, and after a great chat with the owner who loved me, I saw a group of four or five people sitting across the road. Art students waiting to have their turn to visit the flat. They were all so well dressed but also so very up their own arses. So when I walked down the street, I saw them entering and I remember thinking: no way they are taking away my beautiful nest.
I then woke up and never got to find out what happened. But I'm pretty sure the owner then decided to keep the flat after seeing the love in my eye. She just realised she had something so valuable, she couldn't give it away so easily.

19.12.10

Here comes the rage

So here it comes. The post full of rage following today's events and then some.
I showed up at 7.20am this morning at the airport just to sit down and waste eight hours of my day reading the departures screen. No luck, my flight was cancelled. That is of course because nobody can handle the snow and mostly because this end of year is cursed. Fucking rotten.

People had been queuing for ten hours already when I arrived at the Air France desk so I thought I would go home and re-book a flight online. That was only after being told by an hostess that all the foreigners had priority over UK residents and that they had already re-booked all flights until the 24th. The lovely woman also reassured me with some wise advice:
- "You can always re-book a flight in January"
- "Well, January ain't the fucking same, is it? Because Christmas 2010 ain't happening in bloody January, ya bitch!" Seriously...
Needless to say that on my way back I did not give a smile to anyone that crossed my path. If anybody had talked to me or -God forbid, annoyed me, I swear I would have bitten.

I am now at home, checking the sky high prices of the next days' flights. I don't care. Daddy better pay for that. I WILL BE going home for Christmas. Nothing will stop me.

Now. I need a few things. First, chocolate. Then probably a warm room, a fleece blanket, a good movie... If that is achieved, then I will have already managed to calm down a notch.
Also, friends would be handy. But turns out almost everybody's gone home. Lucky bastards.

Oh and if I cannot reach home before Christmas Eve then wherever it is that I find myself, I will buy Champagne. The champagne will be flowing because god knows that getting drunk on champagne makes you momentarily feel all warm and happy inside. So that's my plan B.

Before that, works awaits tomorrow. I have re-taken the shift... Since it seems I'm not quite on holidays yet.


18.12.10

Nothing ever happened

No matter how the environment differs around you, everything is always the fucking same.
You're the same person, with the same thoughts. New thoughts might have been created but old ones are always sneaking around, ready to jump at your throat during your slightest moment of inattention. So beware of the bad ones.

I've been thinking a lot -as you can tell. It would probably be simpler if I could erase part of my memory and start from whichever moment in time pleased me. The truth is, it's not that easy. You can't force yourself to forget, just like you can't force yourself to remember. Feelings make you think in a certain way and no efforts, however devoted they are, will ever help. Ok, I'm not very devoted to that. I have a lazy mind. Oh yes, I actually do -big time. I haven't really, genuinely tried to clear up my mind.

I have lost stuff that there's no way I'll ever get back. So I believe, for now.



1.12.10

Pouce!!! Je me rends.

I've definitely given up on a few things. I realized that this morning when my new Ipod/radio device rang off at 7.30am.
First of all, the radio. People have turned gay -fo' sho. All the music on "normal" radio is shit, guys (and girls) have turned gay, especially the ones who dress with white vests and pretend to tell girls how great they are. They probably don't even know what a girl tastes like. So yeah, the maintstream radio first of all.
Also, this bloody report. I did not sign up to learn how to provide people service. I do not want to provide anybody a service. I want to provide gigs: one off thrilling experiences. Certainly not food on a plate. Don't need to know all about silver service. So fuck SOM. I'll do my very best to pass, but really... this module is going against all my personal career goals.
I really didn't want to mention it, but the snow really? Well, in fact, the snow is good, me likes it. It's the government I don't understand. So apparently you're supposed to check on your neighboors to make sure they have "a loaf of bread, sugar and tea". How about a pack of crisps while they're at it? And this is all because apparently people in need of help are too shy to ask for it. It's not war time as far as I know.
Fourth? Yes, this report again. Maaaaan!!
Oh, I was gonna forget. One thing this weather is not doing in my favour: my creams cannot arrive by plane and in the meantime my hands might well fall off. Ah well. Maybe I should wish for that before monday so I don't have to type the report?? Mhmhm... need to think about that.
And finally: people. God, some people are stupid. I have given up on a few of them. Thankfully the ones I have given up on don't really matter and probably never have. The ones that are pissing me off right now at least still matter to me which I guess is a good sign.

Positive thing? Good music will save us all.